Wednesday, December 5, 2012

8 Men to Avoid







Sometimes on this dating road, there are lots of bumps in the road, and lots of questioning God or lucifer as to why you continue to meet the men you're meeting. And we just wonder, how many more of these crazy men (the NY area men are an exceptionally special bunch) are we going to have to meet before we find HIM.

Or at least before we can just find a regular dating situation, I mean sheesh, can I least met a guy and go on more than a few dates and have it just "not work out". Do they all need to be Gay or against dating or Married?

When do you know you've reached rock bottom?




Well personally, as part of the eternal optimist in me, I refuse to believe there is a rock bottom.....But, if I were to hit one, I think I did hit part of it the other day.

A week ago, my very good friend introduced me to her massage therapist, she thought he was cool, and she had a get-together at her house. We met. I wasn't sure how I felt about him, but after conversing I enjoyed his conversation, and may or may not have ended up in a fun make -out session. It is what it is. What else are house parties for?  But I digress.

Now, a week later, we got together for Brunch, and he tells me (though if I hadn't asked the right question at the right time, I can't be sure when it would've come out) that he's married. Married.

There are so many things I could say about this, and if this had been a different year, he would've been wearing his glass of wine and I would've walked out. Yet, all I could think was, man, God must just really want me to hit all the way bottom first, so that there's no where left to go but Up! I mean, there just can't be another reason can there?????

However, it did occur to me while we played phone tag all week, that he never called me from home. In fact, I recall one specific time in the week we were finally able to connect, he got off the phone with me as he was approaching his home. Which I thought was weird...now I know.
Now that I've reached partly rock bottom (half-kidding here), and I guess am still able to laugh at myself,  I guess that should mean that I've seen a lot of funny things.

Then was born.....

8 Men to Avoid

  • The man who never talks to you when they're home, and only when they're driving, or on a work break. - They're either married, girlfriend, or there is just something about their home life they don't want you to know. And you prob don't want to find out what it is.

  • "The Gay Guy" A man who avoids sleeping with you - See Is He Gay? post for information. Enough said ha!

  • The man who lives with a woman AND calls her his "sister", AND has ever slept with her....or any two of these combinations.....Trust me

  • "The Money Tester" A man who jokes at the end of the first date to see if you'd be willing to pay part of the bill or just tells you some money story during the date, to make you feel bad enough to offer, or is always randomly throwing money into the conversation (more like not having it convos) around your dates. This one is obvious. Remember Steve Harvey's post in My Time=Coffee Cakes!
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  • "The Emperor" He has a lot to say about his grandness and will remind you every second how wonderful he is, how many women have wanted him, and how grateful you should be to have a man like him. But he doesn't seem to care much about why you're so awesome, nor does he ask enough questions ot even pretend to want to know. (Thx Aleka!)

  • "The Critic" He's the guy who may find,maybe a weakness or "fault" of yours if you will, maybe even one you admitted yourself that you'd like to work on, and he will keep harping on it to bring you down. Or even just random things, he likes to "tell you about who you are", very often. He basically continues to pick on something about you, to always bring you down, most likely because you're just so awesome that you scare him. 
  • "The College Dater" - You know? The guy who still thinks dating in college is still appropriate for real life. He may even be in grad school, so he thinks he can milk it even more. Couch dates and whatnot. He usually changes your plans at the last minute, but would love to just "stop by" and "chill".
  • "The One Who Isn't That Into You" - This guy comes and goes all the time. It's really up to you to recognize it and to keep it moving. Just remember the book (or the movie if you didn't read the book). If he's not asking you out, He's not sleeping you (or only wants to), he's not committing to you - He's Just Not That Into You. Walk Away. You're wonderful and awesome, so go find the guy who matches you!
So in conclusion, I don't think you should avoid every guy on the planet. But, I think we can all get better (me included), at recognizing the ones who really aren't in the same place we are. All these men, will undoubtedly come out of whichever phase they're in, when they're ready. It's not your job to wait around for them to. You have many options!  Into. It.

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1 comment:

  1. Or sometimes you hit the "Jack Pot" and get a combination! Such as "The Money Tester", "The Emperor," and the "Critic" which should be reserved solely for 18-23 year old women so they learn who not to date in their mid and late 20's.- Kristin

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